Today, I would like to answer a few questions that a lot of readers have asked me.
I will be trying to answer 5 different questions here. However, before answering those, I would like to tell my readers that all these queries revolve around one single statement – marriage is all about compromises. As requested, I am not going to reveal user information.
Last weekend, I had a fight with my wife in front of my mother. I asked my mother, “isn’t she supposed to listen to me?” On hearing this, she misbehaved and shouted at me, “why are you dragging your mother into this?” Please tell me, who is wrong here? And, Isn’t she supposed to listen to me?
Yes! This is your mistake. First of all, you were not supposed to drag your mother into your fight? Are you guys not mature enough to sort your troubles by your own?
Secondly, why do you think, she is supposed to listen to you, especially when you are behaving in a way that is not acceptable to her? Would you watch a T.V serial that simply is not of your taste?
In simpler terms, if you want her to listen to you, you need to give her an environment, where she loves to listen to you or where she wants to listen to you.
Who knows, maybe, she wants to listen you, but you are not behaving in an appropriate manner. If you want that your wife must listen to you, you must either do something or must not do something that changes her mind.
Hope this make sense?
My wife always wants to know about my day-to-day routine. What I did, where I had lunch, with whom I had lunch, who are my text buddies, who I go for a movie with and so on. Do you think, I should be telling her everything? Is it necessary?
No, not at all. I don’t think so. But, if she is so concerned, then you need to find out the reasons behind it. Is it trust? Is it your past? Any mistake you did in the past? Are you really hiding things? Last, but not the least, how are you supposed to react, if this is about your wife? Would you not be interested in knowing her routine?
I know, this is all about trust. I don’t ask my wife, what ingredients she used in the dinner. And, I am not going to ask until any of her dishes hurt me. Same is the case with knowing about your partner’s day-to-day routine. Instead of running away from her questions, you better answer them.
Just think about reversing the scenario, where your wife is going out and spending hours. Won’t you be interested in knowing, how her day was? And, I am sure, you would be interested in an answer from her as well.
Do I need to fix my schedule according to my partner’s?
On a funnier note; Yes! You have to, if your partner is the bread earner in the house. No questions about that. After all, he is the one going out to make money for living. And, world outside is not going to run according to his or yours schedule.
ALSO READ – What is love, marriage, happiness, and life?
Marriage Is All About Compromises. Is marriage a 50-50?
This is an interesting question. Well, marriage is not all about compromises, but marriage is also about life. Trust me, in a healthy marriage, you are not always compromising. Mark my words! compromises means misery. If you are having compromises all the time, you’ll be ending up with a divorce and its’ dead sure.
Don’t make compromises a part of your life.
Let me ask, why do we make compromises? Compromises mean we are not happy doing something, but we are doing because we have to. Ask yourself, how long can you do something that you don’t want to do?
Marriage is a pain. How can a marriage survive without compromises?
Let me ask! Would you want to resign from a job or a relationship that is giving you every possible thing? I doubt.
Same is the question with marriage. It is not all about compromises. It is about improving your life. Why, will your partner be moving out, if you are giving him a life that he wants? I mean, who wants a divorce from a relationship that is healthy, wealthy, happy, and appealing?
This theory applies to both the partners. Before we want our partner to love or listen us, we must behave like one. And, this can happen only if we communicate. A marriage is about “we” and not “I”.