Girls dream about their wedding from when they turn six. They imagine what they’ll look like, what music will be playing in the background and how amazing their day will be.
Boys don’t put much thought into weddings, at least not like girls. But men are considerably more motivated by ego, they’ll want to show off to their peers.
In both genders, lavish weddings call for hefty sums to create the splendour. But what is the wise thing to do?
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Societal rules dictate a more lavish approach to weddings; a systematic display of wealth via elaborate buffets, decoration and clothing. The more exquisite and expensive a wedding is, the higher the rise of the couple in societal stardom. But this begs the question, why does what society think have any effect on the lives of two individuals?
Assuming that an exorbitant amount of money is spent on the wedding, what does it add to the couple? What if the couple pumps the majority of their savings into the wedding and have little to subsist on afterwards? Will society bail them out or berate them?
This is where common sense comes in – Why spend so much money (that you possibly could do without) on a party that, at most, lasts two days? The whole future lies ahead of you, honeymoon and marriage, does it not make better sense to put aside some money for the main deal – marriage? Is it not better to invest in good household equipment than in purchasing a dress that you will never be able to wear again?
We dream about what our weddings will be like but do we dream about our marriages will equal fervour? There is much focus placed on a single day that it makes one forget that this is the beginning of a long journey of two people who love themselves. Yes, it is a celebration of love but remember that you have not yet begun your lives. I know a couple that went into debt to fulfil their dream-like wedding goals, four years down the road, they split up because they could not bear the financial strain on their marriage.
Moderation is Key
Of course, we all want our fairy-tale weddings but we must learn balance and how to differentiate needs from wants (or plain unnecessary lavishness). Being prodigal during one’s wedding can lead to regrettable wastefulness. Even as we try to find the right wedding dress and order the most sumptuous meals, be careful to know where to draw the line. Have a plan; look at your savings, prioritise what amount should remain untouched and work with the remainder.
Think about the Future
One of the easiest ways to help redirect your course is to look to the future. Imagine you and your partner living together. Now envision the home you share; the patio, the furniture and the garden. Imagine your kids; sending them to school and then college. Think of all the beautiful things you both plan on doing in the future. Think about how definitive it is in the light of an ephemeral party. This helps put things in perspective and before you know it; you are making the necessary budget cuts