No more Compromises – Be a Rebel

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Sukhdeep Singh

Sukhdeep Singh

Write Something To Right Something

Passionate about playing with words. Sukhdeep is a Post Graduate in Finance. Besides penning down ideas, he is an expert online marketing consultant and a speaker.

When you give up your for the sake of someone else’s happiness and that too without having any assurance about whether your pains are going to make that person happy in real terms – that is what you call a compromise.

While doing compromises, when my own life became a comprise, I barely remember. Instead, living my life to the fullest, I seriously don’t know since when I start hauling it and by the time I realized it, it was already too late. Now, I hardly believe in the philosophy of living a life for others. In those cases where instead praising your sacrifices, people are not even ready to acknowledge those deeds of yours; that time, it really hurts. By the way, what is this thing called – compromise. When you give up your happiness for the sake of someone else’s happiness and that too without having any assurance about whether your pains are going to make that person happy in real terms, that is what you call a compromise. Isn’t amazing, I am sad because I want to make someone else happy. My sadness is giving that someone special a reason to smile! I don’t think, I need such a . Do I? Am I the only one? Is there anyone else who thinks the same? Are you in the same boat?

“Why every time I have to compromise? Why do I need to reconsider my decisions all the time? I am a human too. I too have dreams and wishes? Why the accountability and liability of saving a relationship are always on my shoulders?”

To some, “compromises play an important role in ; you need to save a relationship, you must learn to comprise.” But, I would like to oppose this idiotic idea. To me, for a healthy relationship’s survival, it is understanding that plays the role and not compromises. Because I think, when it is about compromises, it is one-sided and one who bows down for the first time, people never expect a raised voice from him/her or I would say, people like you when you are a dumb and you when you are a bomb. Whereas, in understanding, it is about mutual consent between both the parties. “Why every time I have to compromise? Why do I need to reconsider my decisions all the time? I am a human too. I too have dreams and wishes? Why the accountability and liability of saving a relationship are always on my shoulders?” A lot of couples are struggling with these questions and a few of them are already knocking the doors of judicial courts while others are now addicted to compromises.

“Forgiving people doesn’t mean you are weak. It just means that you are strong and open-minded enough to accept that people make mistakes.” People say, “forgiving means you want a relation to survive.” I would like to reject this theory as well. After a certain point, people might take your forgiveness as a symbol of your helplessness; they may take your submissiveness as your cowardliness. Undoubtedly , people will start taking you for granted and primarily in those cases where your partner is already treating you as his/her intellectual property on whom he/she can enforce any wish. Believe it or not, signing up for one compromise means registering for a lifetime subscription. Precisely in our (Indian) society, we are compelled to have compromises and most of the time we are forced by none other, but our . Emotionally, financially, physically or mentally; we are cultivated with these two words – “chal chord (leave it).”

Sometimes I feel, it is our upbringing that defines how we are going to live our life; on our terms or on someone else’s terms. Being a kid, most of us are not allowed to do what they want because our parents think we are not wise enough to have our own decisions. This dependence sometimes (in Indian society) last for more than 35 years and then, we are addicted to it. Though we are capable enough of having decisions, yet even after crossing maturity age, we need someone’s approval. This dependency leads to compromises and finally a lifetime regret. We become a person with no spinal cord, for whom taking a stand against something is nothing less than accepting a challenge. Moreover, should one be doing something according to his/her own wish, people will consider him/her a rebel; not acceptable at all.

People like to discuss about your good and bad deeds. Please correct me if I am wrong – those discussions ends up with you at cremation ground.

Reminds me of a quote – “Sometimes the person who tries to keep everyone happy is the most lonely person.” Stop living to please others because you cannot explain yourself to people who are committed to misunderstand you. For God’s sake! Try to understand, you are not a Domino’s Pizza and you cannot be responsible for everyone’s happiness. Be little selfish. It is not bad at all. Start ignoring things that are hurting you in the neck. You only live once and you don’t want to waste that one chance for a nerd. There is no use of cursing your life for your impotency after a certain age. No one cares if you crying in the bathroom. I have seen people, who keep things inside and then comes a stage in their life when they start talking to self. Despite their endless sacrifices for other, there comes a time in their life, when they hardly see any of those by their side. Once you are gone, what you did and for whom you did, is a matter of one time gossip only. People like to discuss about your good and bad deeds. Please correct me if I am wrong – those discussions ends up with you at cremation ground. 

Dear friend, do not make a joke of you and before you start talking to yourself like lose-heads, it is better to shout – “Enough is Enough.”

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